Monday, November 20, 2006

Hygiene of Swedish and American Culture

Today is another great day in AHFB history: yet another football player left his paper in the fishbowl. I love days like this.

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Blogger Joel said...

I love how there will "be a stink" or one will "have a stink." Ha ha, I could read this guy's writing all day, it's so hilarious.

"having a bacteria or bacterial infection"

I wish football players didn't have to play football so they could write more papers for me to read.

6:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just when I thought that nothing could compare to the wonder that was the paper on the Caribbean. Does this guy not speak in complete sentences? Cause he sure can't get them out on paper.

Wow. this pretty much made my day.

7:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what do you expect with a team that's most common major is "communications"

9:09 PM  
Blogger whit said...

you know, i was in an upper level history class discussion last year with zoltan mesko and not only did we get to snigger at the dumb kids together, but he also made really intelligent comments.

but the football players like this one are so hilarious that they cancel all the zolatn's out...

11:35 PM  
Blogger tekla said...

I like to make these papers more intelligible by imagining them as Press Conferences. Somehow, the statements make more sense that way.

7:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Ow! My beginnings!"

Genius. And slight props to the football player on this one for not using Wikipedia.

But no body should be using that as a resource in the first place.

11:59 AM  
Anonymous ko said...

haha i love the end. it's all slam poetry-esque.

great great find.

12:30 PM  
Anonymous heidi said...

I just had a shitty, shitty week and very little could have made me feel better. Then I read this paper. Thanks AHFB.

Oh, and can we have just one more moment for the DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PAST AND PRESENT? I think he actually switches verb tenses within the same sentence in a place or two. Ah, I love it!

Happy Thanksgiving.

1:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to write a paper on the same ethnography. Reading this one just boosted my confidence. Thanks for the cheap thrills, AHFB!

1:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man, i can write a better paper than that, and im only in 10th grade!

2:59 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

4:54 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

This reminds me of a seventh grade essay; I used voice recognition software (for the first time, mind you) and dictated my essay, because I was too lazy to type it out.

I never read it, I just printed it out and turned it in.

My teacher gave it back to me with an amazing sentence highlighted:

"...but she didn't want to slide hymn off percussion she has a parade that me wood leaf sure baby all own."
The rest of the essay was as unintelligible as that sentence.
Still, I think that my essay was better than "Hygiene of Swedish and American Culture".

1:48 PM  
Blogger Katherine said...

This is possibly the most hilarious sentence I've read in the past month:

"When not taking one everyday to not normal to us and we have a stink that is not normal and that means and shows to other people that you do not take care of you and can also mean no wealth."

Thank you.

1:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

pitty the poor GSI that has to read 75 of those things during their own finals/midterms week... at least this one is hilarious!

which class is that for? Anthrcul 101?

2:24 PM  
Anonymous Romeo said...

Thank you so much for having this blog. I just had the shittiest final exam week imaginable, and finding and reading the Swedish Hygiene paper made me laugh so hard, the ResComp seats are now a little moist.

I could read this all day, every day...

I have to wonder though if this is real. can it be real?
somehow my world and my academic success (and lack thereof) are somehow more justified and a little more manageable knowing that essays like this exist.

keep up the great work.

3:03 AM  

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